THORtheBUNNY

THORtheBUNNY
before that fateful operation

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

independent piece 6

The father was overjoyed at his success, the results were more than he could have hoped for. He had been well instructed in the process of command, he knew what was needed, orders. Without orders the boy he had made was nothing more than a terra cotta in miniature. His first order was an easy choice, "Speak." Once commanded words began to flow freely from the boy’s mouth, no sentences or complete ideas just a babbling stream of words. The golem looked to his creator for approval as the nonsense poured from his mouth. After a moment’s pause our sculptor orders his puppet to stop speaking. For a moment he feared he would have to destroy the abomination, but he could not bring himself to kill it. Not when it looked so much like the son he lost, he couldn’t lose him again. Months passed and the creature stayed locked in the basement, daily the sculptor would descend and spend hours working on the perfect order. Eventually he struck upon the perfect combination of commands to make the boy act as much as a child as he appeared. It did everything a boy should do; it spoke like a child, it fought about bedtime, it tracked mud inside, it could do everything a boy could do except for grow. The creature could not age as a child should, it was a static being. To avert suspicion the father would remake his child monthly, adding or cutting away bits of clay to make the boy appear to grow regularly. With each new physical incarnation came new orders allowing the young golem to age as if here were a thing of flesh.
The father knew that his deception would only last so long, eventually little boys become little men and they leave their fathers behind. The golem would have to leave eventually and what than, he couldn’t be rebuilt and re-ordered if he were living alone. It was the most difficult decision that our father had been forced to make since his son was first taken from him, but he knew what he had to do. He would have to destroy the golem before he reached an age of independence. He would have to watch his son die again, but this time it would be different.

4 comments:

Meursault said...

sounds good
*sticker for you*

Sam C said...

*COMMENT* good job johannes. its kind of a little scary, but its good. NOW YOU GO COMMENT MY STUFF!!!!! god.

Meursault said...

Don't be startled, but now that I've read it I'm making a real comment.
I like this: "[...]it fought about bedtime, it tracked mud inside, it could do everything a boy could do except for grow." It's good...and effective and idk I just liked it when I read it :)
Also, your last, let's say, three sentences have a kind of religious allegorical taste to them. I'm not sure if that's what you were going for or if you did it accidentally but either way I think it brings up an interesting point. (That point being something about free will and God and such...I'll elaborate in class)
And I also went back and read the first one.

Mr. Popken said...

I went back to review the first part--definitely necessary to appreciate this chapter.

You have quite a story developing. I look forward to see how you work yourself out of this one.

I also look forward to having my mind blown.

On a side note, I think you would enjoy Poe's "The Oval Portrait" (short fiction). Check it out and tell me what you think.